Sex in Verania: The Ins and Outs (Ha!)
So, before we begin, a warning: I am going to be frank here in my opinions. Apparently some people don't like that. If you are one of those people who don't like authors having opinions, please click the back button, and I'll see you for next week's blog post. No hard feelings.
For those still reading, welcome. I appreciate it. However, it's not necessary to do the whole they don't know what they're talking about! comment thing. You'll know what I mean in a moment.
Cool?
Cool.
I've sat on this topic for a long time, unsure if I was actually going to write about it or not. I didn't it to come across that I was bitching about something, because I'm really not. This is meant to be some insight in the behind-the-scenes aspect as to why certain things happen. But now we are a few weeks out from Consumption, and I decided to just lay it all out.
Here we go.
I love receiving messages from readers. Those that take the time out of their day to write to me thoughts on books or whatevs means a lot to me.
However.
For some reason, I've somehow managed to give off the vibe that some people can write to me to complain about my books. I don't know why that is, but I usually say fuck it and don't respond. What's the point? It usually only happens once every couple of weeks, and it's easy to ignore it. There are those first world problems again that I seem to have.
But something recently stuck out to me.
On the same day last year, shortly after the release of Wolfsong, I received two separate messages, one through email, the other through FB messenger.
The email asked me why I had to put "porn" in a fantasy book like The Lightning-Struck Heart. "Porn isn't necessary in books," they wrote.
A couple of hours later, I received a FB message asking me why I didn't write more sex scenes in books, that the reader was "okay" with my stories, but wished they had more "steam."
Normally, I'm able to do what I mentioned previously: say fuck it, delete the messages, and move on with my day.
But for some reason, this bothered me. I've been around long enough to have thick skin, but I was having an off day, and it rubbed me the wrong way. Here were two different people with completely contradictory points about my writing.
I didn't respond to either, because I don't know that I could have remained cordial. I even felt bad that I was annoyed, but it didn't make my irritation stop.
I was in the middle of writing The Consumption of Magic. And I was still deciding if a sex scene was even necessary and if so, where I would put it. A lot of stuff happens in Consumption. Big, big stuff. Would any sex scene need to be more towards the beginning? Or maybe closer to the end? Would it even add anything to the story? I hadn't decided.
But after getting those two messages almost back to back, I made a decision.
I was going to write a vindictive sex scene for Sam and Ryan.
I was going to make it fully involved, intricate, and the most explicit thing I'd ever done.
And then I was never going to do anything like it again.
Spiteful? Yeah. Immature? Probably. But those messages just hit me on the wrong day at the wrong time. I've never been known for my sex scenes. To me, sex is almost the least important part of my books. And no, it has nothing to do with me being asexual.
There are some very good sex-scene writers out there, done in books that are not considered erotica. There are some tremendous erotica writers out there who can do marvelous things with dicks in butts. It's just never been my thing.
I was reading an article by a film critic earlier this year who said that he thought sex scenes in films were, for the most part, unnecessary. In summation, he asked what was the point of a sex scene in a movie that actions and dialogue couldn't show you? Why did people need to see simulated sex in a film?
I have nothing against sex. I have nothing against erotica. I have nothing against pornography. I'm good with people who like sex in their books/films/lives/whatever. I'm just peachy with people who don't.
But it has never been my thing. I've talked about this before, but sex scenes in my books aren't ever going to be the focus. At most, there will probably be a single sex scene in a story of mine, if even that. I wish I'd never written a sex scene in Into This River I Drown, but I thought I had to in order for it to be published or considered a romance (and no, the publisher never said anything like that to me--just my own baseless assumption) or for people to even read it. It's probably the one thing I'd want to change out of any of my books.
Back to Consumption.
I figured out where the sex scene would go. And I went to town. Just because I don't write multiple and/or explicit sex scenes in my books doesn't mean I don't know how. I do. I know how sex works. I've had it before.
I wrote the longest, filthiest sex scene I'd ever written in my life. By the time I was done, I felt better. I was, of course, going to immediately delete it and write something much tamer, but still. It felt good.
And then I thought those two words I think sometimes that usually ends up with me getting into trouble or writing a book about werewolves, even though I told myself I never would.
Two words:
What if?
What if I kept it in? What if I left it exactly as it was? What if, what if, what if.
In the end, I kept it.
Look, folks. I love you. Thank you for buying my books. Thank you for helping me to continue to do this thing I love so much. I am literally doing my dream job, which is something many people don't get to say. I am humbled by the position I'm in, and I am grateful for it.
That being said, I do not write to order. I don't write what people tell me to. I never have, and I'm not going to start now. The only reason this sex scene exists was because of I was having a bad day. (Apparently, when I'm annoyed and need to write an explicit sex scene, my mind goes to double penetration, and so that's what I did--I don't even know.)
You wish my books had more sex?
That's okay!
You wish my books had no sex?
Hey, dude, you do you, and that's good too.
I just wish the focus wasn't always about how much sex a book has (or doesn't have) in it. I know I write in the romance genre, but why does sex have to equal romance? Why does any sex at all automatically have to equal "porn"? I am aware I won't ever please everybody (that would be a weird day), or that I won't ever win with certain people. Even now, I am sure some are reading this and wondering where I get off (ha!) sounding so high and mighty, though that isn't anywhere near my intention. I am just trying to explain why this specific scene exists at all.
The sex scene is almost (I think) seven thousands words long for those who want it.
For those that don't, it's in Chapter 7 which is titled Don't Read This at Work or Church (Because of Butt Sex). Yes, I love writing chapter titles for this series almost as much as the stories themselves.
For those that don't give a shit one way or another, hey. Thanks for letting me get this off my chest. (ha!)
Next week, I'll talk about Sam and that little bird in the forest that he brought back to life. Just because you can do something, does it mean you should? Sometimes, true power is not doing the thing you want most. See you then.
Pre-Order here:
Thanks,
tj
PS: No, I still don't have a release date for the audio of A Destiny of Dragons. When I know, you'll know. It'll be worth the wait!
Comments from the old website:
Anahi
I've just finish, like 15min ago, the 4 books on Verania and I don't know what to do with myself. I have hoped that maybe the book with Justina will be out by now and I stumble with this page in my search. I love your story thank you for sharing it with us! And well as to what the blog was about, well sex is part of life is just how it is! But dude hahaha that chapter 7 was... educational to say the least and I'm glad to know a little bit more about the "behind the scenes". I'm happy that you are leaving your dream job and that you stand by what you believe and write exactly what you want, as you said you can't please everyone so just please yourself by doing what you love and how you love to do it! I will continue with my hangover of Verania, waiting patiently for the next story, I'll be happy to read it!
Carol
Hi, let me preface this comment with that fact that a dear friend of mine got my hooked on this series and we like to send each other quotes we're entertained by. I'm currently reading Consumption and got to this chapter on my work lunch break in a public restaurant. Needless to say I snapped a pic of the chapter title off to her and she sent me this blog.
Anyway to get to the point, this explains so much, my poor innocent mind my never be the same again! 😂 Haveheart forever!
Robin
I think your books are amazing & some of the best books I’ve read! Who the hell am I to tell you how to write? I love everything about them, sex or no sex. So please, you do you & that’s all I’m going to ask👍😁
Aditi Ghosh
Woah, You are on fire!!!!!! 👏(I find your books perfectly balanced. So I don't know what their problem is. But it depends on the perspective I guess. Whatever you write, however you write is fine by me as long as you continue your writing.)
PS- I loooooooooooove your attitude. Reminds me of Helena. sigh😍
Amanda
I get lost in the worlds you write. They are amazing escapes into places I want to go, with people I want to meet. You make me laugh and nervous, sometimes in the same paragraph 😉!
You have a gift for writing, thank you for sharing it with the rest of us. Sometimes real life can be hard, sad, and disappointing ( not all of us can befriend our dragons like Sam )it's nice to have a reprieve from my world into yours. So again, thank you for your beautiful, sassy, crude and fantastic stories. Please keep writing and creating, for some of us our dragons don't sleep, and reading gives us somewhere to go when we have to stay where we are.
dee
Thanks for pointing out what your intentions as a writer are and how you can never meet everyone's expectations. We're all different and have different tastes and likes. Everything else would be boring. Plus, there are too many books out there to read them all in a lifetime, everyone can chose to read something else, if a certain book isn't what they are looking for.
I usually don't read books for the sex scenes (be it romantic or just for the sex itself), but I don't mind them if they fit into the book well. Reading your thoughts about the topic reminded me that I have probably let something like that influence my ratings of books I read and I will have to revisit some of those books and over think the reason for my ratings.
Sue Eaton
First off thank you for your quirky, sassy, sarcastic, extremely funny and heartfelt emotions of your writing. I'm always a bit bemused that people think they can tell you what to do. I would also be upset if a stranger came into my place of work and told me to do or not do something because they wanted it that way. Total nonsense. As has been said many times you do you. I love your books the way they are. I want interesting characters with compelling stories. The sex is neither here or there for me. If you never put another sex scene in your books i would still read them. If you wanted to put more sex scenes in your books i would still read them. It's always about the story not the sex.
The best thing you can do is to be true to yourself and your artistic vision. I've seen other authors who have bowed down to what readers have demanded and those books lost some vital thing. Keep doing your thing and I'll keep reading.
Elayne
My requirement in any book from any author is a good, compelling storyline, if that involves sex, that’s good. If it doesn’t that’s good too. I love your work and I’m so pleased you get to do your dream job.
Anya
As long as we're still buying, you're still able to make a living writing and you still put your pants on one leg at a time, then you're winning! There are so many authors out there that provide those two polar opposite readers what they are looking for. Why they felt compeled to fit you into either of those overstuffed boxes is beyond me.
Linda
Its the lead upto the romance for me,the thoughts,the feelings,the laugh out loud moments,the heartbreaking moments,the emotions,the angst,the love,I have a tendency to skip sex scenes if there are too many,which can be repetative and I seriously don't like rough or cruel sex scenes.People can look for this in other books/authors,why want the same thing in all books,does not make sense.TJ I adore your books and style of writing,they are an utter joy ! Never change what your doing,its bloody great !
Jasmine
Hi! If I'm the one who said it your sex scenes didn't have 'steam', know I meant purely on a biological sense i.e. me being a woman. I had thought about my words later on the day and even wondered on modifying my words, but didn't do it as I should have. If it really was myself, I wrote on a post about woman reading m/m books. What I wished I had commented, also:
- how, from all the books I've read (at least 500 just this year) your sex scenes were the MOST original, non-repetitive, interesting, in-character, and healthy from them all. And counting. I'm yet to read sex scenes who don't type off as awkward, weird, too-short, TOO long, shy writer, characters suddenly too shy or too violent, etc. etc.
- Also, sex scenes are never the main topic on your books; you focus on the characters, and it's something deliciously and lovingly put. It's something that grows between the characters, not something the author puts down their throat (literally!). Seeing as sex is something completely natural and healthy, of course any book who isn't for kids will contain them, or at least references to them. There's also no need for anyone to be shy; for me, a really good romance book will at least!!! mention a sex scene between the characters or something equally as bonding if any character is assexual. And as an afterthought, I'm STILL laughing my ass off from Sam's 'eating cake' or Kevin and Gary's 'encounters'. Oh Merlin. Best. Scenes. Ever.
- I don't have a dick. I don't know how it's supposed to feel, really. So it sorts of don't get in my thick mind how things should feel like, and that is what I fully meant.
I would also love to comment how your book "Wolfsong" literally changed my life in ways I'm yet to fully pinpoint. Seeing a family, a working family, united and fighting for their own, was a dear idealization to have for the few moments I read your book, one I'll forever keep in my heart.
Thank you!
Anonymous
I've just finished Destiny of Dragons and am on chapter three of The Long and Winding Road. Needless to say, I'm a huge fan of your work. :) I have to admit I like sex in my books, as long as it moves the story forward and we get a glimpse into the participants' heads. I'm all about the feels. But sex isn't necessary for a good story. You write what you like and we'll keep reading them.
Anise Upshaw
I think the most sensual scene in any book can be a hug. To hug someone just because is just beautiful I do not read your books or any others in this genre because of sex. It is not necessary. Speak your thoughts and write or not write sex scenes. To be honest, Into this River I drown is one of my favorites books now Wolfsong is #1 with me. Thank you for being who you are.
Giulia Iodice
Your writing is 100% on my wave lenght, so I've always found the sex scenes in your books to be meaningful and appropriate (also agree that ITRID could have actually done without one!). Having said this, you now got me completely worried about this dp scene, as in I hope it involves a toy of some kind and not another party between Sam and Ryan😭😱
As you've said, you can't satisfy everyone, no matter what profession you're in, nor should you even have to, anyway. You do you, boo. Can't wait for Nov 20! ❤
James Schmitt
I love your two words, What If. I'd never really thought of things that way but it's true that most people figure out the rules for their own existence, build a brick wall around those rules and never come out. I love that you, willingly or unwillingly, give in to your inner self and let the chips fall where they may.
Telling ourselves, "I can't do that" or "I would never say that to someone" keeps us tied down to a point that we never make waves and that's a shame. The literary world would be a dimmer place without Wolfsong so just maybe your What If moments are part of the secret sauce that not only sets you apart as an author but keeps people coming back for more. After all, Wolfsong showed that there's nothing inherently wrong with a werewolf book either. Werebears though are a whole other thing (but what if, ha ha).
Anonymous
I'm a humble bookworm and all I have to say is: You do you and write whatever you feel like writing. I'll do me and happily read whatever you generously feel like sharing. Thank you TJ!
Tracie
Just tell them that this is not Burger King and they can't have it their way!!!
Anonymous
Ha! This made my day. I'm with you about the sex things. But I feel as though it comes down to the story and style of writing. I've read books that had no sex, but have incredible sexual tension that leaves me panting. I've read books (even my own) where I'm like "Come on! You're going at it again?! Aren't you tired!"
But I really do enjoy your writing style. I've even messaged you about Murmuration and the impact it had on me because of my dad. People can be bitchy because they can. It's as simple as that. You're on the right path with the fuck it mentality. Or as I say "chuck it in the fuck it bucket and call it a day."
An adoring fan,
Becca
Me
Happy to read your work. I guess chapter 7 is a don't read on public transport as well!
Silkeeeeeereads
I normally do not comment. I edit for several authors and am known to be a bit intense on my comments to them, but they send me scripts specifically for me to do that.
Readers need to either like an author’s book, or don’t. Unless you specifically ask someone to email or text you about something, they have no business doing it. Readers should leave a review. In leaving that review, if a reader marks a rating down, they need to specify why. If they are marking it down because of no sex or too much sex, they need to explain that so that others that read that review can roll their eyes or take the words to heart.
I don’t understand why people think that they can give an unsolicited opinion directly to you. It’s rude. Here I am giving my unsolicited opinion about their unsolicited opinions.
As far as sex, put it in if you feel it is warranted or don’t. Your books inspire, ring emotions that most of us aren’t sure we want, and then some of us keep going back just so you make us FEEL those emotions again. I’m sorry you regret the sex scene in Into This River I Drown. I wish you wouldn’t regret anything at all. IMHO, it advanced the characters to a romantic relationship and I’m not sure how that would have been accomplished otherwise. But, I’m obviously not TJ Klune. You may know how. I just don’t want you to feel regret.
I really hope that readers, in the future, abide by the, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all” rule. I’ll hush now, like I probably should have to begin with.
ShaSha
The Lightning Struck Heart made me laugh so hard I scared my cats out of the room. When you can write like that, who cares about the sex scenes. I just worry about peeing or crying in public with your books. It's my greatest fear. There is nothing formulaic in the writing and that's so wonderful. Keep them coming.
Ewa
You are the writer and you know what you want to write. Romance doesn't equal sex. And it looks as some people confuse these two. Anyway ... Into This River I Drown is my favourite. Just keep doing your dream job. All the best.
Angus Gavin
You do what you do and we,the reader can decide hiw much of it we read. I personally wouldn't have you change the way you write, I love the way you write. Lightning Struck Heart turned me onto your books (erm well yeah) and I have devoured each one since laughing,crying and falling in love with some of the charactcharacters . Keep it up (hahaha).
